Heather, Audrey & Luke

Since my brother was having his holiday, and had come to town to visit me, I met up with him in the mall nearby. He brought his girlfriend and her little brother along. We had lunch at a Japanese restaurant, which was on my brother.

While waiting for the food to arrive, I ask my brother, if he'd like to speak to my boyfriend J on the phone. He declined, saying that he'd criticize him. Maybe to avoid hurting my feelings, he made it sound as if he was joking. But I knew better. When I asked again, my brother told me, in a more serious manner, that he'd ask J, "How are you going to protect my sister?"

Further, I also asked my brother if our mother had said anything about J. My brother replied, telling me that after she lectured him about his girlfriend (who never got my mother's approval), she went on about J before sulking silently.

Well, I wish I wouldn't have to feel this hurt.

After the lunch, I made my way back to my room at the hostel. I needed to talk to someone. Through my text message, J had sensed that I needed to tell him something, so he called. In between tears, I told him what I'd learned, and what happened. When I told him about my brother's question, there was a few seconds of silence, before he calmly replied, "Wow, that's a good question."

Now, J wants me to think very thoroughly about this relationship. "I just want you to be happy," he said.

This morning, when we were talking on the phone, he told me that he has an answer to my brother's inquiry. He said he'd use all his strength and ability, doing his best to protect me, and he would not allow anything to harm me.

Now you might be puzzled over the title of this post already. All right, to tell the truth- J and I have been very serious about this relationship, ever since it begun 2 months and 13 days ago. It had been the third day of our relationship. We were leaning against the railing of the balcony outside the campus's library. He'd asked me, "If we do get married, do you want me to earn more money or you earn more money?"

I told him it'd be better if he earns more.

"Okay... how many kids do you want?"

Smiling, I told him I'd like to have three children. We'd later decide that 2 girls and 1 boy would be nice, so that the little guy could learn to be protective instead of having a girl gone tomboyish.

Then, during one of our phone calls, we'd actually chosen some names. Heather, Audrey and Luke.

We have both hoped for it. Great campus life together, high-paying and fulfilling careers, a wonderful marriage and lovely kids. I have wanted him to escort me, to walk me through the rest of my life.

I wish, that there's nothing standing in our way. I really do wish so.

God, tell me, what I should do.

God, since you've allowed this relationship to happen, I pray to you- help us work everything out. You have chosen to let us love each other, so please spare us the heartbreak.

God, help us.

I wish, I could be free from my family's expectations and opinions. I wish they would let me live my own life. I don't want to fear them. Why, I don't want to be restricted by them.

Nevertheless, looking at the positive side... I'm still one extremely fortunate girl. =) All right, I'll always get what I want.